Scary thought? Can you imagine, running into people from your past that you really don’t want to have to face because they don’t think well of you?  What crossed your mind when you saw last week’s exercise?  Most of us, yes including me, have skeletons in our closet. There have to be people in your past that you did wrong. Maybe you didn’t treat them wrong but maybe you didn’t treat them right. There are errors of commission, and errors of omission. Maybe there are people you could have done something to help and you didn’t? Maybe there are people you treated wrong or actually did something wrong to? Who is there that if you ran into that would immediately recall how you did them wrong? Why? What does that say about you? Do you own your share of what went wrong? Have you thought about finding that person(s) and apologizing?  Has the way you treated this person (s) and how it makes you fell ever crossed your mind between then and now? It has for me. I think the wrongs that we do weigh on spirit and suck some of our energy. We need to find a way to let this go. Apologizing is best, coming to grips with what you did is a start.

 This Week’s Talk

Scrooge apologized to the gentlemen… and then told them he was going to make a sizable contribution to their organization. That is taking things to the next level! Imagine how that could turn things around. Not just cleaning the slate but actually turning a negative into a positive. Making lemonade out of lemons. I have mentioned that it isn’t our circumstances that define us but how we react to them. I don’t think acting out of guilt, or trying to buy happiness or peace of mind isn’t a good thing either. Doing something to help others because you can, because it is the “right” thing to do, because you want to… all are good reasons and will carry sincerity with them. Doing something as a way to get the moral high ground, to be a “do gooder”, to gain bragging rights, or to make yourself feel good will carry  its own negative weight.

Reflecting on the people you identified above, what can you do that is your equivalent of Scrooge and his generosity with the gentlemen?  Am I asking too much? You think it would be hard enough to track down someone you wronged and apologize and now I am asking for you to do something for them? Maybe you can do something anonymously like make a donation to a charity that they identify with or a cause that they believe in; and make it in their name.

This Week’s Assignment

After Scrooge moves on passed the gentlemen, he makes his way to his nephew Fred’s house. The movies and the books differ but for the most part they have a maid answering the door and letting Scrooge into the house. Then Fred’s wife greets Scrooge and is pleasantly surprised that he has arrived at their house. Fred is so surprised by the happy nature and demeanor of Scrooge that he asks “ Who’s that?” 

I am certain Dickens didn’t just write this scene in this way to be funny or express an element of surprise. I earnestly believe that Dickens was calling out how Scrooge has changed so much and how his arrival at the house is completely out of character. Being happy, truly happy, looking happy, and participating in a social event like Christmas Dinner highlights how much Scrooge has transitioned into a new man.

We don’t know each other and I don’t know for sure what you are working on to make you the best version of you.  There is knowing, and then there is doing. As we have gone through this adventure together you have been working through the exercises and thinking about how things relate to you and the you that you aspire to be.  This is an exercise requiring action. Scrooge had to go back on his whole bah-humbug position regarding Christmas, had to change his mind on seeing no value on social gatherings and them being just a waste of money, and allow himself to be happy with just being in the moment even when it adds no wealth to his net worth.  Your assignment this week is to do the same for you and your changes. You have had plenty of time to think about the new you, to put yourself in the story line, and to internalize the new you. This week it is time to take a step as the new you. Go out and be the new you, what ever that is. Be more serious, or be more fun. Be more outgoing and extrovert, or be quieter and allow others to have more air time. Be willing to take the lead… or be willing to be a good follower.  Whatever it is for you, get out of character and into the new you.

See you next week…